Long Run 11

The morning after a long run is usually a combination of sore muscles, hurting tendons and blistered heels. Not today though. I set out the house yesterday morning at my regular Saturday time of 4:45 am or so, not really knowing what distance I was going to run. Somewhere, the fact that I'd breached 30K the previous weekend was playing on my mind. The siren song of laziness, reason and comfort was telling me that I should just take it easy today. Enjoy the run...don't think about hitting a long distance. Do a nice, easy 20K. Fiendish the voice of reason is. I shrugged off these internal voices.

I set off at a good pace around 5:15. This time the lights were all on in the park. I felt really good...no twinges, no aches. I still wasn't thinking about what I'd run. I went a little harder because I was feeling good. Around the 15K mark when I circled back to my car to refill my sipper, a guy in front of me yelled, "hey you're doing exactly what I am!" I was too focussed on just getting back on the road but looked up to see another runner refilling his sipper from gatorade bottles. As I wolfed down half a banana, we exchanged a couple of words about how he was training for the BLR marathon in October. The unwritten but strong as ever bond between runners has never ceased to amaze me and it still does. Almost total strangers and no other apparent connect melt away in the knowledge that you both enjoy that sweet exhaustion that only distance running brings.

At around the 18K mark, I was gliding along, never having felt as good around this distance. A quiet smile of happiness. 25K came and went and I decided to go for 30K again. I went at a consistent 7:30 pace for 25K which is a huge improvement for me from previous weeks. I was stealing 30 seconds for every K I was running as compared to earlier runs. The last 2 K weren't the greatest. I think I mentally just shut down but at no point did I consider not going 30K. In hindsight if I had set my mind to it, I could probably have gone 31-32 K or so but I'm fine with this effort. Small increments and small wins are most important. It's a marathon after all,  not a sprint! I finished in 3 hrs 52 minutes, slashing 8 minutes off my previous week's 30K. That's an average of 16 seconds faster per K than the previous week. That's huge. As I stood on the scales this morning it was clear why I'm being able push this way...I'm now 8 kilos lighter than I was in April of this year. My diet has radically changed. My vital stats must all be inching towards good or very good. My heart rate has definitely fallen. My recovery has never been better. With just under 2 months now for the KTM, there is still loads to be done on my core fitness, hitting 35K distances and overall strength. But it's never looked better or brighter.

What's most striking is the spin off effects all this running is having on my life otherwise. My wants and needs have shrunk. The  pace of the world around me is perceptibly slowing down. One of our greatest sensory pleasures: food, has taken on a different hue. I wake up early. I sleep early. I don't crave things. The noise that surrounds my life (just as it does everyone else's) is slowly but surely being turned down where it's not a clamour but a sighing sound to examine and muse over. I take increasing pleasure in the simple things: a good book, a new song, fresh vegetables, a good day's work, a long, hard, exhausting but inspiring run. Life's truths become more apparent as you still your mind. This is a truth I know from Vipassana. But giving oneself up to something completely pure with no reward, no other motive than for the innate joy of the act itself also brings one closer to that clarity of thought. And to this end, I hope I don't stop running anytime soon. 

Long Run 10

Having had to take a forced break the previous weekend due to a muscle pull, I was both apprehensive and determined to make up for lost ground this weekend. I had a great set up for the weekend run with lots of salads and whole grains, early bed times and wake ups and a generally healthy week in the lead up. Anxiety was high on Friday night as I prepared to sleep but I told myself to worry less, be in the moment and loosen up, to really enjoy the run. I thought of the fresh smell of grass and bamboo, the nippy early morning air, the colours in the sky as the day dawned...to experience these was one of the big attractions to get up and get out. It helped me settle down and put myself to bed. I had veiled ambitions to attempt something more than 25K but I couldn't even muster the strength to admit that to myself. I was scared.

I started my run by 5:20. As is often the case in our great city of Bangalore, the entire section of streetlights from the Cubbon Park aquarium entrance to the tennis stadium were switched off. It was pitch black literally and I just had to trot along in the hope that I didn't step on a sleeping dog or a broken beer bottle. I went into today's run with lingering doubts about my muscle pulls and blisters and the 2 week gap between my last long run. All fears were allayed and I was running a little harder than usual. I timed 6 splits today of 5K each. My first 4 splits were all an even 38 minutes. This tells me that even as the distance piles up, I'm not slowing down and I'm able to maintain a consistent pace without much effort now. After I hit the 20K mark, the miles started to sink in. I slowed, began to flounder. My right ankle hurt. A lot. Then my back. A lot. Then a beautiful german shepherd decided to run right into me and threw me off the trail. The inclines suddenly seemed insurmountable. All things were conspiring to end my run by the 22-23K mark. It was then that I kept repeating a few mantras in my head that morphed from mere mantras to self-evident truths. Gandhi said real strength does not come from physical capacity but from an indomitable will. Mere words but so true. The other is the Rararmuri saying that "when you run on the earth and with the earth, you can run forever". I scratched the surface of both these truths today I feel. At times I felt I was dizzy and going to collapse. At times hunger hit me hard. Thirst too. When I tried to force down a biscuit or cashew, my stomach heaved. But despite everything...the pain, the hunger, the thirst I somehow managed to summon reservoirs of strength I didn't know I had. Every time my head dropped, my shoulders slouched I could will something out from deep down which saw my back straighten, my arms come up again and helped me keep going.

At 25K I knew I had to push on and push on I did. That last 5K was very slow but I wasn't too concerned. When I did hit the 30K mark, it was a surge of adrenaline and a wave of joy. I involuntarily let out a yell of delight and a pump of the fists. It felt good. I felt good. I stretched and then surprised myself with a jaunty walk back to the car, singing out loud. In all my previous training over the last 9 years, I've probably never run a 30K training run nor have I been on my feet for 4 hours straight. There really is no other way. If you want to run long, then you have to run long. My recovery too has been excellent. My confidence is slowing rising...a quiet sort...a humble sort of confidence. Inclines are still killing me. And a section of the Kaveri course is supposed to be one big incline. I'm still carrying weight that is better shed. But for now I'll raise a silent toast to a good, honest run today. 

Mid week saunter

I didn't put in a long run last weekend. I made the mistake of going to the gym on Friday morning and pulled my inner thigh muscles on the rowing machine. Stupid. I'm resolved to stay away from all gym contraptions here on for as long as I am seriously running. My last injury which put me out for 3.5 years was PF after pounding the treadmill with bad form.

I rested the entire weekend, did my physio and recovery tasks and feel good this week. I had an easy 5K saunter this morning and felt some discomfort in my left calf...that's been bothering me for a while. I can only hope it's not something that will explode on a long run or worse, on race day.

I've been eating less, eating healthier and overall feeling like a million bucks. I seldom feel that end of day tiredness anymore. I sleep well and wake up refreshed with no grogginess. Salads, daal, unpolished rice, vegetables, fruit and some dairy form all of my diet now. I've cut out almost all processed foods and even cereal from my diet. No meat of course. No eggs. I'm also cutting out the white rice and wheat, though not completely. The urge to run, to feel alive, to push myself further, longer to the edge of exhaustion is burning bright. My overall well being too has taken a dramatic turn but that always happens when one runs...things slow down everywhere and it's a beautiful sensation to not be affected by things happening around you.

More inspiration came this week with Scott Jurek completing the Appalachian Trail in record time. He ran, trekked, climbed and walked for over 45 days and covered over 3200 kilometres. That's an average of 75 kilometres a day. That's 1 ultra distance every day for 45 days. It boggles the mind and then some. I'm re-reading Eat and Run again and this time making notes of all the tips he provides runners throughout the book. A wealth of information.

I'm happy I put in a 5K this morning and now will try and keep loose till Saturday when I'll attempt a 25K distance again. I have 9 more long run weekends including the one coming up. My next set of long runs will need to be something like 25K, 20K, 30K, 25K, 20K, 35K and 25K. I'm still hesitant about fully committing to the Kaveri Trail Marathon. But now, running a half marathon really doesn't feel like a challenge anymore and if I do run the half, it'll be because I've registered and to experience the event and not because I'm pushing myself to achieve something. Back to the present, I'm hoping for a decent long run this weekend.

Long Run 9

I sailed past the 20K mark listening to OneRepublic's unmistakably catchy song "counting stars" playing on..."everything that kills me makes me feel alive" the song goes...and I struggled with the dichotomy of truth and insanity in that line. Yet it made sense. 21K and 22K were also cool and my rhythm was so good I thought if I wanted to, I could go all the way to the 30K mark on current form. That's when I learnt an important lesson: never underestimate the course and never overestimate your own seeming good health. If I'd stopped and done a proper check I would have known: I was thirsty and hungry. My sipper was empty but water was only 20 meters away in the car along with a salty snack or banana. At 21K I should have refilled, eaten and continued. I decided not to and paid the price. By 23K my mouth felt so parched there was no saliva at all. I had stopped sweating completely and experienced that floundering, thirsty, defeated, head-down sensation only long distance runners will understand. My own bloody fault. That 1/2 litre of water would have shaved off 3-4 minutes easy off my time.

I was down with a terrible cold on Thursday and tried to blast it out with a massive dose of Wikoryl. It kind of worked and I felt kind of normal on Saturday morning. By Saturday evening I felt so normal that I ditched my initial plan of an easy 10K and decided to push 25K. I started off slow and timed splits of 40 mins on four of the 5K laps. The last 5K went awry thanks to what I described above. That said, I put in a solid run, felt strong, confident and at no point did I feel this wasn't going to happen. I also "stole" a few Ks early on...by just being in the moment, not looking at time or distance and just focusing on my breathing, on my form and on keeping hydrated. It was pitch black for the first 30 mins so I also had to pay attention to the ground. Before the sun came up, I was already 6K into the run and before I really began to "feel" the stress, I was 10K in. This is a good sign. I need to get to a stage where the "stress" really starts to build only 20-25K into the run. But then again, I need to get to many stages!

I'd said in my last post that 25K was a mountain too tall to climb this weekend but I did it. And I did it without much struggle. I ended up with a massive blister on my toe which I hope will go away soon. I hope it doesn't cause something more debilitating. Now that I've breached 25K (in 3:24) I need to do it again next weekend and then plan for a massive push up in the following weekend with a 30K attempt. This 30K and a 35K in August will be my two longest training runs as per the training plan. I am not entirely sure about this plan and may push for 1 or 2 more 30K distances before, just to be confident of standing at the gun of the full in Kaveri. All said and done, I'm making progress: I'm now actually considering the possibility of lining up in 2.5 months for a full marathon! Didn't see that coming but it's testimony to what the human body is capable of and the hidden reservoirs of resilience we all have access to but don't find because we never search deep enough for it. 

Long Run 8

June was a good month. Rewind back to May 1st when I finished the first 5K training run of this season to today and it's like chalk and cheese. I'm almost 6 kilos lighter. That in itself is astounding.  What is more satisfying is that I clocked 3 half-marathon training runs in the month of June. Now that's progress.

Around 10K into into the run, I had my music turned off (I've been doing that off late much to my own surprise - it helps me focus better and concentrate on form) and I could feel my legs and knees bouncing up and down the trail in a nice springy fashion. It felt like how a newly-serviced bike or car feels when all the springs are well-oiled and energy is being returned with every bounce. My body felt hard and yet light. I had to search back in time to remember that feeling because while it wasn't a new sensation, I hadn't experienced it in a while and then it came back to me.

I was 16 and a half years old and was coming off the best cricket season I'd ever had. I was overweight and a tad slow on the field no doubt. I was losing revs on the ball no doubt. My footwork could have improved if I lost weight no doubt. I went into the selection tournament and came up as one of the top wicket takers nonetheless in a tournament spanning more than 7 teams. I didn't even find myself in the state probables list of 35 boys for the U-19 team. I was told it was to teach me a lesson. That I had to see that I couldn't continue as an "unfit" cricketer. All the coaches and selectors I respected and held in admiration had let me down....to teach me a lesson. That's when it was suggested that I join an athletics and badminton training fitness coach. This was 1997. I joined V R Beedu and it changed my life. My cricketing fortunes fluctuated and once AIESEC happened, I altogether gave it up but 1.5 years with Beedu was a transformational experience for me. 5 AM gym times thrice a week and 6 AM cross fitness times 4 times a week left me lean, mean and hard.

The last time I experienced that hard, springy, bouncy sensation last was when I was 17 at what I consider the absolute peak of my fitness. I reclaimed some of that fitness when I ran my 1st Mumbai Marathon in 2008. That was a long time ago as well.

Anyhow, back to the present. I put in a decent run, completing 20K in 2 hrs 36 mins. What was great again was my recovery. Absolutely no aches or pains or calf soreness or tendon inflammation. Zilch. I was feeling solid. I put in a nice, easy 5K on Tuesday. I've reclaimed that state where 5Ks really don't do anything. I just wipe off the sweat and start my day or carry on with whatever else I'd planned. 5Ks are becoming literally a small workout now. I'm glad. I had planned on 25K for the next long run but that's not going to happen: I'm down with a bad cold and cough. Better to rest and tide this over than to push myself and risk something worse. I'll try and make up for it through the week with 2-3 medium length runs of 10 K each. I can't wait to go out there and experience that hard as a coiled spring feeling again.